Rođenje deteta i kriza partnerstva - prikaz slučaja i partnerska terapija

Abstract

Razumevanje društvenih i porodičnih trendova, omogućava porodičnim terapeutima bolji uvid u promenjene porodične, partnerske i odnose između roditelja i dece, u čemu mogu da pomognu sociologija porodice, socijalna demografija, socijalna psihologija i socijalna psihijatrija. Pažnja pri opservaciji porodice treba da se usmeri na životni ciklus porodice, tip porodice i obrasce funkcionisanja. Treba imati u vidu da ulaskom u brak svaki partner unosi obrasce iz svojih porodica porekla, individualna osećanja, očekivanja i potrebe. Svaka promena u porodici je značajna, a posebno ona koja predstavlja prelaz iz jedne u drugu fazu životnog ciklusa. Jedna od njih je i rođenje prvog deteta. Upravo je ovo prelazna tačka koja prouzrokuje stres. Rođenje deteta može da dovede do problema u porodičnoj organizaciji, što se najčešće odražava na partnerske odnose. Sukobi nastaju oko preuzimanja odgovornosti i teškoća funkcionisanja u roditeljskoj ulozi. Iskustva iz prakse ukazuju da krizu partnerstva mogu imati i mlađi kao i nešto stariji partneri. U ovom radu biće prikazane dve partnerske priče primenom kvalitativne analize. U pitanju su roditelji, starosti preko 35 godina, u prvom braku, visokog obrazovanja, sa jednim detetom. Porodice se nalaze u fazi životnog ciklusa, koju po često citiranim autorima Duval i Hil (Duvall i Hill, 1948, Duvall, 1971 prema Mićović, 1988), nazivamo - porodica sa malim detetom (od 3 do 5 godina). Oba para dolaze na terapiju sa problemima oko podele uloga, obaveza, komunikacije, emocionalnih i seksualnih odnosa. Iz ovoga sledi kriza partnerstva. Biće prikazan terapijski proces, tehnike korišćenje u radu sa partnerima i ishod terapije.

Understanding of social and family dynamics, taking into account viewpoints of sociology of family, social demography, social psychology and social psychiatry, can provide a better insight into various family, couple and parent-child relationships. Close observation should be focused on the family's life cycle, its type and patterns of group functioning. One should always take into consideration that when entering into a marriage each partner brings patterns from his/her family of origin, individual feelings/emotions, expectations and needs. Every change within a family is significant, especially the one that marks a passage from one into another, that is a different phase of a life cycle. Such one is definitely a birth of the first child. This exactly is the point that causes high level of stress within a couple. Childbirth usually brings challenges to family organization, which is often reflected onto the couple. The possible conflicts are usually related to issues of responsibility and the difficulties of adaptation to a parental role. Research experience shows that couples' crisis is common with younger as well as with older partners. In this study we will present two case studies, where we deployed a qualitative method. The stories describe two couples above 35 years old, in their first marriage, both with tertiary education and one child. These families are at the stage of the life cycle often cited as 'family with a small child' (Duvall, Hill, 1984, Duvall, 1971 according to: Mićović). Both couples that joined therapy were experiencing conflicts related to a division of tasks and responsibilities as well as to an acceptance of a father's role. We will demonstrate the therapeutic process, techniques that were employed in working with partners in crisis as well as the outcomes of a treatment.